


Reunion

by knightlyss



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Because I can, F/M, and because I am soppy and weird, spoilers for 5x02
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-20
Updated: 2014-10-20
Packaged: 2018-02-21 22:58:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2485319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knightlyss/pseuds/knightlyss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>”Why are you so happy that I'm back?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reunion

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really sorry I'm not more sorry about this. I just had to get it out after that hug in the premiere. I'm usually not this melodramatic... *cough*

Their reunion after Terminus had somewhat ended before he had wanted it to, as he found himself having to make room for Rick and the others to pay their respects to her undying love and devotion for the group, reciprocating as best they could with embraces and words of praise. Compared to their mighty words and actions, Daryl had felt like an illiterate fool, only managing to mumble something unintelligible into the crook of her neck, as he held on to her, lifted her off the ground and silently swearing to himself that he would never let her go. As if it wasn't enough to break his promise half a second later, the tension that overtook them both in the following hours was enough to lead him down the path to insanity. He had no way of knowing what was going on inside her head, nor did he expect her to let him in on it any time soon. Her face was closed off, in a way, differently masked than before she had left. It told him to leave her be, until she was ready to share. The only thing that gave her pain away was the near invisible frown; Her special Carol frown that usually meant she was thinking hard about something. It was an expression he rarely saw, faint but there. His earliest memory of her looking like that had been Sophia's death.

 

He supposed it was better this way, having a silent companion instead of none. He didn't want to admit it to himself fully, but he knew he was keeping an eye on her, partly to convince himself that she was actually there, and not some hysteria-induced hallucination. Her and Tyreese had been gone for so long that it had felt like years. Then again time moved differently in this new world. Every day was a year gone by – another year of surviving. And here she was beside him, eyes fixed on something unseen beyond the road, looking older than he'd thought possible. It didn't take a genius to see the damage lingering under the surface of her skin.

 

He hadn't asked about what had happened, and Tyreese hadn't said anything so far. There was clearly an unspoken agreement between Carol and Tyreese, maybe even respect. He was curious as to know what had moved them to put the past aside, knowing it was rooted in survival. There was more to it though: Tyreese had mentioned Mika and Lizzie, the blonde sister orphans from the prison, but the girls hadn't appeared when the group reunited. That had been his first clue to look out for her well being, and he had done so, vehemently. She had always been quiet. Hell, she was quieter than a mouse when it really came down to it, but this was a different kind of silence. The silence that you recognize because you once took part it in yourself, disappearing in a maelstrom of emotions and unseen walls that hid you from everything and everyone until you ceased to exist. He knew the feeling all too well, and he was never going back. Not after how far he'd come.

 

Before long, frustration took in. They had been tracking the Cross Car for miles, somehow managing not to loose sight of it even once despite the distance between them. Now though, they slowed to a stop, finding themselves facing an intersection, and no way of knowing where to go. He felt himself seething with rage at the hopelessness that threatened to overtake him. _Not another one. Not ever again._ He slammed his hands against the steering wheel, not at all surprised at the growl making its way up his throat. Carol was quiet beside him, and he turned to find her already watching him, her expression changed to one of... pity?

 

”We'll find her.” she said, looking as sure as he felt. Nonetheless, he nodded once, with that familiar jerk of his, then turned the wheel and made them take the road on the left. He could feel her eyes still on him, and something in him wasn't sure why he preferred her silent solitude over this. He felt as if he had been placed under a microscope, or a magnifying glass, burning up in the sun that was her. In terms of dying, it wasn't a terrible way to go, but something in him struggled to accept the fate she was unknowingly submitting him to. She didn't make it any better by speaking up again, once they'd covered another few miles. ”Why are you so happy that I'm back?”

 

He was surprised he didn't crash the car. Managing to get himself under control in the split second it took to process her question, he floored the break and swerved to the side, letting the car head into a ditch. It bounced and stumbled down the grassy slope until it finally came to an halt, and he turned it off immediately, turning in his seat to face her.

 

”What the hell kinda question is that?” he demanded, eyebrows knitting together in confusion and, if he were honest, anger. She had the decency to look ashamed at his retort, but they both knew she was done cowering to people. Calmly, she started over.

 

”Everyone made their peace with it, Daryl.”

 

”That's a lie - I sure as hell didn't.” he snapped, unsure of where this was going.

 

”Why not?” She sounded curious, and he had to shake his head at that. She was a fool. They both were. Blind fools stumbling around in the dark, no better than the walkers out there.

 

”Because you're my family.” Her expression remained passive, and he had to suppress the irritation bubbling under the surface. What he wouldn't do to make her see how important she was to the group, to him. It occurred to him then, that their roles had been switched around completely. Back at the farm, Carol had done her best to keep him close by, determined to prove just how big a part he played in the group's survival. He was unique, one of a kind, and she had repeatedly beat him over the head with the facts until he had learned to accept them, adapting them to fit into the rest of him, the puzzle pieces that defined him as a human being. It seemed the time had come for him to try and do the same for her. Looking back at how stubborn he had been, how he'd hurt her and tried to push her away, he was suddenly awestruck. The woman sitting in front of him had been a warrior from day one.

 

”You're too important to give up”, he tried again, hoping he was making at least some sort of sense. ”Everyone is. Rick is like a big brother, always looking out for you. Michonne is that crazy distant cousin that visits sometimes and always makes you laugh and knows exactly what you're thinking. Glenn and Maggie are the newly-weds that you can't help but watch from a distance. Beth...” he swallowed, ”Beth is like that annoying little sister you never had, the one you can't live without. The one that gets under your skin.”

 

”Am I your sister?”

 

”No.” he said, a little too quickly. Her face quickly changed from indifference to one of anger and incredulousness.

 

”Daryl Dixon, if you think for one second that looking out for you means I am old enough to be your mother-”

 

”What, no, I don't want you to be my goddamn mother!” he shouted, slightly horrified at the notion. Was this the relationship they had? Did she really think that she was mothering him? He sighed as she turned away from him, going back to staring out the windscreen. ”I want you to be you”, he continued, forcing himself to calm down, ”I want you here. I want to start over.” Her chin quivered slightly at this, and she turned her head further away from him, not allowing him to take part in her weakness. Frustrated, he leaned back in his seat, head thumping against the neck brace behind him. Damn whoever had invented the English language; He would personally smother the people responsible. It did nothing but drive wedges between people. Silence, however, was no better. And yet, it consumed them both now, as the night went on, oblivious to their troubles, stretching out over them to cover them up in a dark blanket.

 

”Sophia **was** mine”, he said quietly, a few minutes later.

 

To be honest, he didn't even know why he had said it. All he was aware of was the loss and pain that was flowing through him, reminding him of what had passed. He felt simultaneously alive and deceased, like he could soar into the skies, or inflict pain, and it wouldn't make a difference. Maybe this is what it was like to be a walker: to feel invincible and mortal all at once. He could feel her eyes searing holes in him, but he didn't care any more. Out with it, and damn the consequences. He had had enough of pretending no one was important. Enough of excuses.

 

”Merle was mine. Beth was-is mine. Rick is mine. Hell, even Carl and that lil' Ass-kicker is mine.” He turned then, deciding to face her head on, face his fears that were so clearly etched onto her own face. ” **You're** mine.” he mumbled, eyes searching for a reaction. She blinked hard, never taking her eyes away from his. It looked like she finally seemed to understand. He was struck by a sudden burst of inspiration from his days on the road before the reunion.

 

”I claim all of you, dammit.”

 

She stared at him for a moment longer before barely nodding, a tear sliding down her cheek as she did so. Quickly, she reached up and and wiped it away, just as he leaned over to do the same. Their foreheads clumsily collided, and he sighed out of frustration, hand placed gently over hers where it rested on her cheek, permitting himself the close proximity of head to head, noses almost touching. He mumbled an apology that earned him a mixture of a laugh and a sniffle in reply. Her hand was warm underneath his, her skin soft and comforting, and he found himself wanting to somehow snake his way under her and use her as a shield from the outside world. He wanted to disappear inside her heart, inside the one thing that was safe from the tainted world around them, at least as safe as could be under the circumstances. Most importantly, he wanted her to do the same to him. He wanted to protect her, damn her pride, to keep her safe from all this bullshit.

 

Once again, he found himself wondering just how he had landed himself in this odd predicament. He'd always been sentimental, courtesy of his mother, but it had been small doses. Now, with the end of life and life reborn around them, his sensitivity flared up and consumed him. Only difference between then and now was this time, he'd happily let it swallow him whole, as long as she was there with him. As long as his family was there, he'd be all right. Slowly, Carol slipped her hand from under his grip, taking hold of his hand and stroking it with her thumb.

 

”You're mine too.” she whispered.

 


End file.
